Hey so a while back I got into a fight with my…

Hey so a while back I got into a fight with my friend about Femme Flagging(painting one nail a different color to show that you're a lesbian) and she would believe that it was a gay thing, she thought it was just a thing. Can you give me a quick explanation of it that I can show her? Thanks!

Hi! So this is super interesting because things like this (i.e. using what are essentially codes to interact) are really prevalent in our community. We have a few articles and posts discussing it, but I can totally give a brief explanation/breakdown.

Flagging is prevalent in our community because being out and open can be incredibly dangerous. It’s a way to identify each other as safe people to interact with. The hanky code used by gay men is one example, and femme flagging is another.

Your friend might be confused because she’s thinking “but I see straight people do this all the time! It’s just a style” Cishet people love commodifying queer culture. We see this all the time. Trends that get popular in queer circles, especially those made popular by black queer people, go mainstream without any reference or regard for the groups that start them.