“The first thing that was clear for both of us was our shared wish to have a child; I told him that I was looking for a father for my children and that this would be the purpose of our marriage. Being a woman in Algeria is difficult, but being a single mother is even harder!”
Amelle could have decided to adopt, but – as in many other countries – it is a long and drawn out process for couples in Algeria. It is especially hard if you are single. “Before, Farid had taken steps to adopt alone, but as a single man, he didn’t succeed, so we’re going to start a kind of homoparental family,” said Amelle. “There’s no reason why I should have a heterosexual sex life. My gynecologist knows I’m a lesbian and she said she’d organise everything – she knows the whole story.”
As soon as Amelle and Farid agreed what they were going to do, everything went quite quickly. She introduced Farid to her family. “He’s a very nice chap. My family loved him and immediately adopted him as one of their own,” Amelle recalled. He followed tradition by coming with his parents to ask for Amelle’s hand in marriage. They got engaged in March 2017, and are planning on tying the knot in February 2018.
Like Farid, Amelle has never come out. “Other than close friends, no one knows he’s gay – it’s a bit like me! I’ve got a few cousins who know and support me. My relatives said it was a good thing that I’m getting married so I can carry on living a quiet life. As for my mother, I’m sure that – even if she doesn’t let on – she knows.” Amelle insists on her happiness, on the “relief” she feels since she got engaged.